Strict Standards: Redefining already defined constructor for class wpdb in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 52

Deprecated: Assigning the return value of new by reference is deprecated in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/cache.php on line 36

Strict Standards: Redefining already defined constructor for class WP_Object_Cache in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/cache.php on line 389

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Page::start_lvl() should be compatible with Walker::start_lvl($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 537

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Page::end_lvl() should be compatible with Walker::end_lvl($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 537

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Page::start_el() should be compatible with Walker::start_el($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 537

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Page::end_el() should be compatible with Walker::end_el($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 537

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_PageDropdown::start_el() should be compatible with Walker::start_el($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 556

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Category::start_lvl() should be compatible with Walker::start_lvl($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 653

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Category::end_lvl() should be compatible with Walker::end_lvl($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 653

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Category::start_el() should be compatible with Walker::start_el($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 653

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_Category::end_el() should be compatible with Walker::end_el($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 653

Strict Standards: Declaration of Walker_CategoryDropdown::start_el() should be compatible with Walker::start_el($output) in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/classes.php on line 678

Deprecated: Assigning the return value of new by reference is deprecated in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/query.php on line 21

Deprecated: Assigning the return value of new by reference is deprecated in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/theme.php on line 508
Everlastingtruth.com
Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

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Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 510

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 511

Deprecated: preg_replace(): The /e modifier is deprecated, use preg_replace_callback instead in /home/micahn/everlastingtruth.com/wp-includes/kses.php on line 446

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Just a quick word to say….


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I got married!

Unbelievable eh?

It was the most fun I’ve ever had at a wedding which is a great thing. Didn’t want the day to end, what fun!

Just got back from the honeymoon. Now to get back to the grind….

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Final Measurements


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After the last post we took our final pictures and measured our shrunken bodies for the last time. To say the results were phenomenal would be an understatement! Both HES and I were surprised at just how much we lost, not on the scale by around our bodies.

I am down 15lbs which is nice but somehow I lost a total of 17.75 inches off of my body! This includes 4.75″ from my waist, 3.5″ from the hips and 2″ from my moobs aka chest. I wasn’t the only one that lost big. HES lost 10lbs and 11″ from her body in the six-week challenge. This includes 3″ off of her waist and 1.75″ from the hips! Neither of us can get over just how skinny we feel in the midsection.

And as if this wasn’t enough, I still feel like there is plenty more to lose! We talked about it and decided that we are going to stay fairly hardcore for another 4 weeks until HES’s 30th bday and hopefully we’ll have even better results by that time. Even after the birthday we will continue to eat better but allow a few more acceptable things into our diet.

For the past week I haven’t lost any weight but for the first time today I had to pull my belt to the 5th and innermost loop to keep my pants on.  This belt has seen me go from the outermost loop to the innermost. I love it. What a change in such a short time! Six weeks is nothing!

We’re hoping that one of us will make it into the finals to have a chance to ‘win’ the competition, but honestly I think the two of us feel like we’ve already won.

Before and After Pics Coming!

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44 days (or so) of Paleo


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Well here we are on the eve of the end of the Paleo competition/experiment. This is something I apprehensively set out to do with HES and a team of people but in our eyes it has been a huge success. I have no clue if  HES or I will win the competition, but I feel as if we have already won….or lost..haha. The changes that have taken place these past 6 weeks have been phenomenal and I feel these changes have given us a new fire and energy for everything we do! Nearly everyday we come home and talk about how good we feel and how excited we are for the future.

We have definitely seen some weight loss and inches melt off of our middles, but I won’t know the real numbers until tomorrow. Perhaps the biggest change and most inspiring thing is how different we both feel,…especially my lovely lady. For the past few years she has constantly been struggling with bloating, irritation and all sorts of digestive issues. Since cutting out all of the sugar, dairy and grains she has done a complete 180. In addition we both have more energy, better sleep and happier dispositions! Sounds crazy, but it is true. I’ve always struggled with the afternoon slump but I rarely have that feeling anymore. My energy is constant throughout the day and I love it. I rarely wake up at night anymore and for the most part feel so much more rested in the mornings.

The thing that speaks volumes to us is that we’re not the only ones. There are some amazing happenings going down at the boot camp as many others are reporting the exact same thing as we are. I go online and see all of the other success stories and transformations and think “there is something to this”. The best part is that it is not that hard! I have never lost inches as easy as I have these past few weeks. All of my fellow Krav instructors are beside themselves and asking “what are you doing? You look so fit!” etc..etc. That means a lot coming from folks that are in tip top shape.

So now what? We started this competition thinking it was a ‘diet’, but we’ve ended it knowing it really has become a way of life for the both of us. I don’t think we can ever go back to the way we were.  The hardest thing is knowing how to incorporate some of the food we restricted. I know I will have to be careful allowing too much sugar back in my diet or I will want it all the time again, thankfully I have found some pretty amazing natural alternatives for that. HES will have to watch the cheeses, but after 6 weeks we’ve found we just don’t crave them as much as we used to….we still love them, but we realize we don’t need to eat 10lbs of cheese a week. :)

This has been such a life changing experience in such a short time I wish everyone could or would try it. Many people scoff and think it’s just a fad diet, but if you’re serious about your health I highly recommend a look at it. ****WARNING OPINION**** I think that the conventional wisdom, FDA, doctors and the like have really led us astray. The traditional food pyramid is a joke and eating that much grain/sugar has caused our nation of people to not only balloon in size but  accept things like Type 2 Diabeetus, high blood pressure and obesity as a normal way of life. This is wrong wrong wrong and completely depressing. Knowing what to put in our bodies should not be so difficult to figure out, yet there is so much misinformation, confusion and lies as to what is good for us we’re left with our heads spinning. Ridiculous.

Tomorrow is the end of the competition, but the beginning of a new way of thinking.

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2 Weeks on the Paleo Train


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So it’s been two weeks and I’m still going strong on the Paleo. It really hasn’t been too bad at all. After telling my boss all about what I can and can’t eat she went ahead and ordered 2 pizzas for the office yesterday! Ha. I told her I could pick the meat off of the meat lover’s and that’s exactly what I did. Threw it in my salad and it wasn’t a bad meal at all. I have to admit that a little bit of cheese might have fallen into my mouth but it was minimal.

Today I decided to weigh myself again and amazingly I was down to 169!!! This is especially cool since I have been sick all week and have only worked out half as much as I usually do. I am quite pleased to see results on the scale but what is even more exciting is hearing everyone’s wonderment that I look thinner around the belly. We still have 4 weeks to go!  I can only hope that the results continue to come and my body continues to ‘transform’. Today is exciting since we are going to a Paleo potluck later in the day. I can’t wait to dive into all the delicious food!

Until next week. Keep eating the meat and doing the burpees.

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A small goodbye


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Rest in peace dear great-aunt Nancy. Your funeral is starting right now, I’m sorry I couldn’t be there. I remember your birds, smoking (sorry you were the only relative I knew that smoked) and wry smile. You were always very kind to my sister and I, and had a way of talking to my cantankerous grandfather that blew my 10-year old mind. I’m sorry I haven’t seen you for many years, I hope to see you on the other side. I’m glad you’re no longer in pain.

Truly,

~me

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Don’t like the sicky!


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My Pa says it is because I workout too hard, my Phil says it is because I am weak willed….I don’t know what it is but I’ve got a case of the sniffles, the runny noses, sore throats and plenty of coughing. Ugh. I’m happy to say that I’ve still been going strong on my eating and haven’t caved for anything naughty. I had to skip working out today, I really didn’t want to and even got up in time to go, but after walking around and trying to wake myself up I could tell the morning would be better spent sleeping in and recouping. Of course none of this stopped me from going to work which is where I probably picked up the sickness! My boss has been sick and spending her days hacking and licking everyone’s telephone. This kind of behavior makes it very difficult to stay healthy. Oh well, I have to remind myself this will pass and the constantly tickle that feels like little mice burrowing deep into my nasal cavity will end soon as well.

Until then, phlegm it up!

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Paleo way to go?


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So I don’t want to jump the gun here, but for the past week I have been doing the Paleo ‘diet’. I say diet because it hasn’t really felt too overwhelming like some diets I have tried. Instead I get to eat delicious, yummy meat which I love, but cut out dairy, sugar, carbs. So far the hardest part has been the sugar! I’m surprised at myself. I never knew I had such a strong desire for sugar after every meal, but I do. I need to buy some berries today to have on hand.

Here’s the thing. I weighed myself last weekend and I rung in at a solid  178lbs. Not bad considering I’m still down 25lbs from the weight I lost 6 years ago. I’ve done a great job maintaining but even at 178, I’m not where I want to be. Yesterday I stepped on the scale and couldn’t believe my eyes. The number read 171lbs!  7lbs in 6 days? How? How without feeling hungry or miserable? Sure I workout hard, but I always workout hard. This is kind of amazing and was just the thing I needed to power through all the temptations set before me last night.

This will be an interesting experiment and I’m excited to see where it goes. I’m going to do my best not to weight myself for another week as I know weight can really ebb and flow in the day-to-day. Also, I’m less concerned about weight as I am about inches. I want to lose at least 2″ off of my BELLY and an 1″ around the moob area. Can I do it in 5 more weeks? We will find out at the end…

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Happy New Year 2012!


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I am resolving to update this space some more. There is much going on in life and I haven’t bothered to sit down and write about it like I’ve wanted to, but I need to.

The hosting company was hacked awhile back and my site along with many others were compromised. Viruses were crawling all over these pages like pimple juice on a teenager’s face. I apologize if your computer was affected. All should be fixed now!

Here’s to a bigger and better year! Already things are exciting and fun…let’s hope they continue that way :)

~M

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The T-mobile Store - For Adults Only


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I was sitting at my desk pretending to do some work this afternoon when my friend calls me:

“Hey! Did you upgrade your phone yet?”

“No.”

“Well now is the time to do it, T-mobile is having an awesome sale this Friday and Saturday where ANY smartphone is free with a 2 year agreement.”

“No way.”

“Yes way!”

I wasn’t sure if I should believe her so I looked it up on the Internets and sure enough T-mobile is practically giving away phones. I am in dire need of an upgrade since my current (un smart) phone likes to randomly turn off and add extra letters when I type. I think smart phones are cool, but they always seem so expensive so I have avoided upgrading to one.

I wrote my friends who are in love with their smart phones and they gave me some guidance as to what I should get. After the work whistle blew signaling the end to another glorious day I made my way to the T-mobile store to see what all the hype was about. As I entered the store I was greeted by a chubby salesman with bushy mutton chops that would make Elvis turn in his grave.

“What can I do for you?”

“I wanna know about the free phones this weekend.”

Mutton chops immediately shot me a look and said

“Where did you hear about that?!”

I suddenly felt like I was privy to some sort of insider T-mobile info that only Catherine Zeta-Jones or that new girl in the polka dot dress should know.

“Well a friend called me and then I saw it online.”

“Oh, ’cause we’re not supposed to tell anyone yet and I didn’t think T-mobile released any info about it.”

We chatted and I confirmed the deal was as bitchin’ as it sounds and this delighted me down to my frinkly toes. After getting all the details I decided to go check out a few different phones even though I was pretty sure which one I would choose. Most of the phones were off and had a screen shot pasted to the front of the display. Lame. What a great way to sell a smart phone by not turning it on! After some more searching I found a phone what was similar to the one I was looking to get. I started playing around with the display and thought it might be cool to see what the internet and software keyboard felt like.

I opened the internet (amazed I even found it) and since I have never used an on screen keyboard I took my time and slowly tried to navigate to msn.com. After 15 seconds of very deliberate typing I managed to type in ‘msn.cpm’. The little phone crunched away trying to navigate to a site that didn’t exist and I tried to stop it by pushing all of the buttons. Eventually I hit a magic button that brought the phone back to its main screen.

Again I brought up the internet and meticulously typed in m…..s…..n…..com. When I pushed ‘go’ I realized I had added an extra letter and typed in ‘msnm’ (or something like that).

“Damnit!” I exclaimed, just as an elderly man stood next to me and began looking at a phone.

It was then that I encountered the speed of the 4G network. A site quickly popped up and staring back at me were a pair of eyes and other parts of a woman that I did not recognize and words flashed across the screen “The internet’s HOTTEST girls!”

“OH SHEEEEIT~!”

I frantically started pushing buttons on the phone faster than a Stenographer at a murder trial. Nothing I pushed took away the adult images and I’m pretty sure the old man next to me caught a glimpse of ‘Busty Betty’ and ‘Voracious Veronica’. In the midst of my panic I actually ZOOMED in on the web page which was the exact opposite thing I was trying to accomplish. In a flash of brilliance my brain told me to think of home and ‘go home’. I pressed the home button, the phone went back to the home screen and I decided that maybe I should go home as well.

I laughed the whole way home. Some poor soul is going to get an eyeful when they check out the internet features in that T-mobile store, courtesy of me.

On second thought…..maybe I’m not ready for a smart phone.

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First post of the New Year!


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Only 8 days late.

Dang facebook ruining all my postings. Every since that website got all popular I find myself neglecting my blog and only doing quirky remarks on facebook instead.  Boo.

Need to get on here more.

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