Archive for September, 2007

Penguin Torpedoes

Just watch this. I thought this was so cool. They look like torpedoes shooting towards the surface. A great shot! Truly Amazing.

Comments (3)

Got a girl

Recently my sister informed me that I have a not so secret admirer. It seems I have captivated the heart of Rebekah, my 3 year old niece. My sister asked Rebekah who she was going to marry and very matter of factly she answered, “Uncle. I’m going to marry uncle.” I hadn’t thought much about it until yesterday when she was talking about it again. Oh well, I’ll have to let her down easy..

Comments (3)

Gonna make a jaaaaailbreak.

I’m not sure what I ate before bedtime, but the other night I had this crazy awesome dream. I was in prison with a bunch of my closest guy friends. This wasn’t the ‘easy come easy go’ county jail, it was more of the ‘Federal pound you in the a**’ prison (thank you office space). Dirty and gross with metal bars everywhere I decided I didn’t want to be there anymore. So my cohorts and I planned a jail break. The planning stage of the dream is a little blurry but basically we found a way to escape through the air vents, classic I know. We all snuck out from where we were supposed to be and then we dropped into this tiny hole face first. It was extremely claustrophobic and dark. Our shoulders could barely fit in the vent and we had to take shallow breaths since we were unable to fully fill our lung with air. At one point I started to freak out because all I could see were feet in front of me and someone’s head behind me.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity of slithering through the vents, we were out. Someone (I can only assume it was one of our ‘contacts’ on the outside) hid tuxedos for us to wear because we were expected to be at an outdoor wedding reception that night. Sure enough we found our hidden tuxs and helped each other do the cufflinks and the ties..etc. I wasn’t so sure how bright it would be for us to show our faces so soon after breaking out of jail, but I didn’t speak up. We went to the reception and it was beautiful. Randy, one of my fellow inmates got up and gave a great speech.

The next day was Sunday and I was doing my best to lay low at my safe house. Two of my friends were determined to take me to church, I argued that I should probably stay inside because I didn’t want the whole world seeing me after my daring escape. In spite of my protests they made me go to the late service. My worst fears were realized as we pulled up to the church and over half the guards from my previous residence (jail) were there! They weren’t there looking for me, they were dressed in their Sunday best greeting and slapping backs! I didn’t want to go in but it was too late, the girls were practically dragging me and it was attracting attention so I started acting natural. Acting natural was difficult since I wouldn’t look any of the guards in the eye. I kept my head pointed straight at the ground and commented on everyone’s shoes.

After the service I made a beeline back to my safe house and did my best to stay out of sight. After awhile this proved difficult as I was so jazzed that I actually broke out of prison and got away with it! I wanted to tell the world, but couldn’t. My fellow inmate and friend Dave, took a different approach. The very next day after the breakout, he was busy with business as usual. He was going to offices and fixing computers, setting up networks, and handing out his business card like a grandpa with tootsie rolls. I couldn’t believe it. I confronted him about his boldness and he said, “well now that I’m outta jail, i’ve gotta make a living”. I reminded him he wasn’t ‘outta jail’ he <i>broke</i> outta jail. Didn’t phase him. The dream ended soon after and I was happy to wake up and realize that I didn’t just break out of jail, and I didn’t need to lay low.

Two people that do need to lay low are Micheal Scofield and Lincoln Burrows. They are the two main characters on Fox’s Prison Break which starts it’s third season tonight. Although it would seem that I was thinking of this show last week, thus giving me the dream I had, I in fact was not. Regardless of the similarities, I assure you that Prison Break is much better than my dream. I can’t believe I watch a show about inmates breaking out of jail, but really it’s a great show with strong characters and prison love scenes. If either of those sound good to you, check it out.

Comments (2)

Since my last post…

I know it’s been quite a long time since my last post, I don’t know what happened but it felt like I could never get back to my blog.
So here’s a quick update of what has happened since I last wrote:

I am now a proud Grandfather of three

I just started collecting Social Security

I am semi-retired and in my spare time I joined the Benevolent and Protective Order of the Elks

Last week I had hip replacement surgery, this was after my ‘fall’

I became a millionaire but lost it all investing in portable toilet seat warmers. At the time ‘Hot Buns’ seemed like the perfect thing to put my money into, it was a product I could really get behind.

Formed a bluegrass metal band called ‘Bluetallica’. We were huge in Argentina and Mauritius but had to break up after an unfortunate straw hat incident.

Found the meaning to life, but lost it.
More to come…

Comments (5)