Archive for October, 2007

10 years could indeed be scary

On this All Hallows’ Eve I’d like to give a shout out to my dear friends Laura and Mark to congratulate them on celebrating their 10th year of being married!! Wooo hooo! Pretty cool, they’re a little nutty but a great match. I also want to thank Laura for having a zombie party on Sat. night and forcing me to dress up (or otherwise be eaten). I haven’t dressed up for a costume party/halloween in years and years, but going as a zombie was very fun. Saturday night was probably the longest I’ve ever spent on my makeup, I think I was in the bathroom for nearly 45 minutes. Usually, if I’m in there that long it’s because I’m doing a big job, but on Saturday the only job I was doing was transforming myself to look like the undead. Loads of fun. Phil and I looked pretty scary and Phil didn’t even put any makeup on! Amazing! We went to two parties and had a blast.

Tonight we went to Daves and hung low as his wife handed out candy. She was determined to be that house on the block. And by that house I mean the one that gives out whole candy bars. By 8:30 they’re supply of whole candy bars had been completely depleted and we had to turn the lights down low. These kinds of finds don’t go away in the minds of children. If Dave and his wife don’t move, next year they are going to be in for a big surprise.

Take a look at scary pics from Sat. night!

Look at our nasty wounds!

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Speaking of nice hands

If you’re ever sore and you’re longing for a hot woman to rub her hands all over you, I know just the person. My amazing friend Jasper has recently become an official LMT (Licensed Massage Therapist). I say ‘official’ because she has always been rubbing people down, now she has initials after her name so it looks better. Before the LMT the meetings were usually scheduled in some dark alleyway or under the Burnside Bridge, but now she has come out in the open and has even secured her very own massage space! This is exciting stuff. In case you’re wondering just how good Jasper is, look at a review by a recent client:

“Mmmmmmm so, good. MMmmmmmmmmHmMmHM want more” –Micah

She has fingers that poke and press, elbows that dig and hands that squeeze. She’s sure to make you groan, grunt and wail….sounds like most of my Saturday nights! :) I shouldn’t even have to tell you about the benefits of massage. Most people see it as a luxury but honestly I feel so much better for weeks at a time when I see Jasper regularly, and so will you. But first you have to make that call and convince yourself you deserve it. You do.

In addition to having heavenly hands, today is Jasper’s birthday. She’s turning 20-something. Make her birthday great by giving her money in exchange for a massage. Then you can personally meet the exquisite woman with piercing green eyes and radiant smile that has a natural knack for massage and healing. You won’t be disappointed. I never am!

Happy Birthday Jasper! It is with much love and pride that I can call you such a great friend.

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Rodrigo y Gabriela

I kept seeing their names in the store, and on tv but never paid much attention to what I was seeing. I knew that Rodrigo y Gabriela was some new group but it wasn’t until I saw them on a Leno a couple months ago that I started to pay attention. Even then I thought they were only a cover band since they played a cover of Metallica’s Orion. It was interesting and cool, a little different since there was only two classical guitars. When I heard ‘Diablo Rojo’ on the radio I realized they were awesome and I would need to hear more of them. I went home and quickly downloaded their album.

They really are insanely good musicians. In the first 3 days I must’ve listened to their album over 20 times. It’s like discovering something for the first time, and realizing how much you’ve been missing out on, you just can’t get enough.
Their music has such a strong drive and intensity to it. Constantly pushing and crescendoing. I love it. They do have a couple slower tunes but this is not their real strength.

Apparently the two of them used to be part of a speed metal band which makes perfect sense why they would lean towards rockin’ songs and faster beats. Rodrigo is an excellent soloist and shows his skill, speed and precision quite well even on a classical guitar. Gabriela’s rhythm guitar skills are second to none. She is doing so much behind Rodrigo’s soloing it is truly amazing. In fact she does things with her hands that I never thought were even possible! Although now I’ve begun to think of all the uses for someone with hand skills such as hers. I would list all the things I have thought up but I’m trying to keep this blog PG-13ish. If you don’t believe me, check out the video below of one of my favorite songs. Fast forward to 47 seconds to skip Letterman’s blatherings. Sit back and enjoy the sounds of Rodrigo y Gabriela and dream with about Gabriela’s hands…I bet she can make mashed potatoes in 30 seconds flat.

Hit this link to see the video. 

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The glories of H3 on 360

Some of you may have noticed that I haven’t been blogging as much lately. That’s because I haven’t been. It’s not for lack of desire or funny happenings in my life, on the contrary I have had many happenings and great stories of hilarity to share, it’s just that my time has been focused on other things…….namely a little game of wonder called Halo 3. Now before you groan and say, “great he’s going to talk about video games” I assure you that’s exactly what I’m going to do and you’re going to like it!

In short, Halo 3 is awesome. It is so well put together and well thought out it is a blast to play. The single player is great, but that is not where the game shines, it’s all about the online multi-player. So much so, I haven’t even finished the single player campaign, instead I spend most of my time online beating down all the little boys and girls with (very little) help from my comrades Dave and Phil. Actually D&P help out most of the time. When I decide I need an extra 4 kills I’ll invite Dave into the game, he’s always good for at least 4. When I decide I want someone who can kill the enemy with fervor, but still has more deaths than kills, I’ll invite Phil, that guy sure likes to die. All in all the three of us do pretty darn good. Halo has a great matchmaking system that usually does a fine job of putting us up against other players with nearly the same skill level. Once in awhile we will get totally creamed or we’ll waste a bunch of poor blokes, but usually the matches are nearly even, making for heart racing nail biting games.

Really the best thing about H3 is the balance the game incorporates. If you have a huge heavy weapon that does lots of damage, you move slower and can’t turn as good. Lighter weapons can be dual wielded giving you more fire power to your tiny bullets. I love the sense of teamwork that comes from playing together. It seems like the whole H3 community is more focused on teamwork. Maybe it’s the level design, or the new weapons or people are finally cluing into the idea that working together is where it’s at. Whatever the reason I enjoy the camaraderie with my buds and other people that join our team.

Just like Halo 2, H3 has an insane number of stats that are tracked not only within the game but online at Stats may not seem like a big deal but if you haven’t already figured it out, I’m a big nerd and I seriously enjoy looking back at my previous games to see how good I did. The stats seem to give me something extra to reach for. Sounds silly but it all wraps up in a nice little package.

I was about to end this blog and review of H3, but that would be a crime if I did not mention the newest and greatest feature of Halo 3. Everything you do whether in campaign mode or multiplayer is recorded. Not only is it recorded, but you can go back and review the whole game from any player’s perspective or even detach the camera and float around taking the action in from all different angles. This is huge and for the uninitiated I will explain. I can’t tell you how many times Dave has called me up and says “DUUUDE! You should’ve seen my game last night, I was on fire, I threw a grenade and it bounced off of the jeep’s windshield, flew over my head, hit a tree and killed three guys!”. My usual response in the past has been “Sure Dave.” But now Dave can put the video where his mouth is, although I know this won’t stop him from telling me all about the video before he shows it to me. That’s just a Davism. Everything is streamlined, you can make a clip out of the cool things you did during a match. Some matches last 10 minutes long and that’s boring to sit through when the only cool thing you did lasted 4 seconds. With a click of a button you can send the video to a friend for him to check out. Super sweet stuff and definitely a nice attribute of next-gen gaming. More and more games are incorporating picture modes or theater modes. Great stuff.

So if you haven’t already, go ahead and pick up a copy of Halo 3, it is loads of fun. You’ll need an Xbox 360 to play it on, so if you haven’t already, go ahead and pick one of those up as well. Here is a clip of insanity from the game.

well I did have a video clip but the embedding of it is screwing everything up, so here is a link to it:

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Gunshots ring out like a bell…

Last week I pulled into my driveway and turned off my car. I got out, made my way towards the back and as I unlocked the trunk a huge boom shattered the silence of my afternoon delight. The boom wasn’t alone it was accompanied by a searing sound that sliced the air above my head. The sound continued down the street, ricocheting off of the houses and cars. “That was weird” I muttered as I pulled out my briefcase from the trunk. My fingers were wrapping around the handle of my laptop when the boom happened again, just as loud, just as violent. Again something shot over my head and I seriously began to wonder if I was being shot at or the government was testing bombs in my backyard! Just then I caught a movement on the corner of my eye and noticed something fall from the sky. In the middle of the street was a small black object spinning and slowly wobbling until it came to a rest. By this time half the neighborhood was outside looking up, down and all around. The neighbor a few doors down stepped into the middle of the street and inquired, “What the hell was that?”. “I dunno, I thought it was you!”. I noticed he had been working with power tools when I first pulled up so I thought maybe he did something. We made our way to the black object and upon further investigation realized it was some sort of cap. It looked like the top of a spray paint can, but much bigger. All the men of the neighborhood were standing in the middle of the road, talking and speculating as to what happened. Unbeknownst to me the electricity went out at precisely the same time of the booms. With our superior brains we deduced that the boom was caused by something electrical and the black caps (hmmm…black caps, I love black cap jelly) that were in the middle of the street were from the power lines up above.

Sure enough I went inside and we had zero power. Cindy called the power company and they said they knew about the problem, 300 people were without power and they’d have it fixed by 5:45. I almost didn’t know what to do with myself since there was no internet or electricity. I managed my time by doing loads of reading, tons of guitar playing and working out, it was actually very nice. 5:45 turned into 7:15 and the lights came on just before I had to start lighting candles. As it turned out a car hit a pole a few streets over which caused a transformer or two to blow up and it must’ve sent a shockwave through the line causing the ’searing sound’ I heard over head. Pretty crazy stuff. They fixed the electricity but our street lights are still out.

Bonus points to the person that knows what song the title of the post is from. NO GOOGLING!

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And now I’m famous!

Well almost. But look! I’m on a billboard! Can you believe it? Me neither! My dad always said my name would be in lights, but who knew? Anyways, real estate is going good, a bit slow at times but I’m still plugging away at it.
I am giving away two (2) free hugs to the person that can tell me where my very own billboard is located.

Hint: It’s in America.

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My house is famous!

Googlemaps has had a ’street view’ for awhile now, but it was only used in big cities like New York and Las Vegas. Now they just added Portland! The crazy thing is, they also added parts of Milwaukie (where I live). It’s pretty cool, and a little scary but check it out:

I went through and saw the last two houses I’ve lived in. Pretty neat! Look at that bitchin’ car in the pic! Now I’m going to go and look at all my other friend’s houses. This brings stalking to a whole new level!

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It’s ok, I can stomach it.

I am a huge lover of food. Most people like food a lot, so do I. I’m not really much of a food snob, I like the cheap stuff on up to the gourmet stuff. I can eat those hostess chocolate covered donuts that taste like plastic and a $40 steak in one sitting. I will not discriminate. However like most people I do not like foreign objects in my food. Unexpected things buried deep inside a mound of food are not welcome treats. Most of the time the ‘things’ are harmless. Things like hair, plastic, the mysterious crunchy and the occasional finger have been found in food. I think we can all relate to the sick feeling upon discovery, feelings of sinking stomachs and the sudden loss of appetite. I remember years ago working at my first job at a buffet restaurant. I was on break enjoying a mediocre noodle dish when in between the noodles I spotted a long black hair. I immediately felt ill, hacked and gagged and felt miserable the rest of the night. Of course I was fine, but in my mind I thought I might die because of the grossness factor.

Today I was just finishing up with work when my mother called on the cellular telephone. Since I was by her place she offered to bring home a little lunch for us to eat together. The nearest food place in her area was a Wendy’s so we agreed on salads. “And a baked potato!!” I blurted, right before she hung up the phone. I was feeling saucy, I hadn’t had a baked potato in awhile and given the fact they take so long to make, who knows when I would have the chance to have another one? As I drove to our rendez-vous point I thought of Mitch Hedburg’s quote:

“I like baked potatoes, man. I don’t have a microwave oven; it takes forever to cook a baked potato in a conventional oven. Sometimes I’ll just throw one in there, even if I don’t want one, because by the time it’s done… who knows?”

Mitch is so right and I didn’t want to miss an opportunity to have an already made baked potato. Lunch was grande, the mandarin chicken salad was delicious and I got to enjoy the entertainment of watching my mother hold my 18 month(I’m not sure how many months) old niece as she was trying to grab for every bite of food my mother tried to eat. I was nearing the end of my baked potato delight when I looked down and noticed something weird in my tater tray. I examined it, poked it, smooshed it around to make sense of it. Part of it looked like potato goo with sour cream and butter residue and the other part of it very much like a dead cockroach with with sour cream and butter residue. Hmph.

Mom: What’s wrong?

Me: I don’t know.

Mom: What is it?

Me: I don’t know, what does that look like to you?

Mom: Well? I don’t know. Potato?

Me: Doesn’t that look a lot like a sort of bug, namely a cockroach?

Mom: ……

Me: Tell me it’s nothing, just tell me it’s nothing.

Mom: It’s nothing.

Me: Ok.

I was sad becaus there was one good bite of potato topped with sour cream and chives that I really wanted to eat. Amazingly I really wasn’t grossed out. I mean, it was gross! But I didn’t have that sinking sicky feeling in the pit of my stomach like I used to get when I’d find hair in my pasta. I think all the Fear Factors and Survivor shows have taught me that you won’t die if you live bugs, let alone if a dead one touches your potato. Just to be sure, I topped off my cockroach potato with one of my sister’s delightful pecan dessert things. And for added insurance against any bug disease I ate a taco bell taco tonight which will either burn out the bug poison in my stomach or give me diarrhea which helps cleanse out any bad stuff.

Now all this food talk has made me hungry, Wendy’s chili doesn’t sound too bad right about now.

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