sickly inventions

When you’re sick, do you ever find yourself thinking about inventing machines or products that will instantly relieve your discomfort? I do. Since this week I’ve developed a rattling, raunchy cough I’ve decided to invent the lung sucker (now with throat numbing capabilities!). This handy device would consist of a small tube connected to a small vacum. On the end of the tube would be a powerful spray and/or salve that would effectively numb your throat rendering your gag reflex useless. A sensor on the end of the tube would find your lung hole, insert itself and suck out the nasty, annoying lung butter that causes you much discomfort and distress during the day. I have dreamt of this device all week. Ever since my cough turned……’juicy’ it has plagued my mind.
Earlier in the week I thought about another tube-ish device that I could shove up my nose into my sinuses and clean them out. This would also have sucking capabilities, but on the end of the tube would be either menthol, horseradish or cocaine. Anything that would clear my nasal passages and allow me to breathe.

These are just two of the many devices I have thought up over the years. Have any of you thought of anything?


  1. Phil said,

    April 7, 2007 @ 8:03 am

    Just don’t get sick!

  2. Pamela said,

    April 7, 2007 @ 10:13 am

    I would invent a robot that would empty my lung sucker after I used it.

  3. Stout said,

    April 7, 2007 @ 9:18 pm

    as i painted my house, i wished for a machine that would instantly change the colors of my walls. i hear there is something coming for that last one, some sort of paint that has something built in that is sensitive to electronics or was that a dream?

  4. mego said,

    April 9, 2007 @ 11:34 am

    i think all that snot is going to your brain!

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