I’m not a very good boyfriend

I found this out last night en route to my friend Liz’s wedding reception. I was all suited up in my sharp duds and fancy shoes walking arm in arm with HES on my side. It was cold out (as we all know) and even though I thought we were moving along at a brisk pace m’lady asked if we could step it up a notch since she was shivering and cold. Quickening our pace we approached the crosswalk where HES suggested that we cross. I began to look left and then right to see if it was safe but my concentration was interrupted as I felt a strong downward pull on my left arm. On the corner of my eye I could see that HES was down near the ground and I thought “what is she do—” when without warning my left foot shot up towards the sky, followed by my right foot. I remember seeing the crosswalk, then the lights, the sky (ooh look Orion!) then the sidewalk…up close. It seems that even though the streets were wet and above freezing, the dippy part of the sidewalk that segues into the street was a sheet of ice.

Yes friends, I fell on my girlfriend. Not just any fall mind you, not a half trip where I land on her foot or a slip where I half catch her as I fall. Nope. I’m not that good. This was a 100% feet flying out from underneath you fall and the only reason I’m still alive to talk about it is because the girlfriend cushioned my fall. I’m not saying she’s ‘cushy’ no no, I would never say that, I’m just saying she was a barrier between me and the hard cold ground. Laying on the hard cold ground in your spiffy duds doesn’t make one feel very cool. I quickly sprang up to make sure she was ok, but really I was trying to stifle my laughter. I probably wouldn’t have fallen had she not pulled me down, I was strong until my slippery dress shoes made contact with the ice, after that it was all over. Not even He-man could’ve kept his balance.

We dusted ourselves off and made sure the middle age ladies approaching the crosswalk didn’t try our trick of falling and proceeded to go to the reception. At the reception is where I learned the #2 reason why I’m not a very good boyfriend. At some point I apparently told HES that this reception was ‘casual’ which I don’t remember doing, but I must have. I thought HES looked beautiful but after about 2 minutes she turned to me and said “well great I feel completely out of place” I figured it was because she didn’t know anyone, but in reality it was because everyone was so spiffed up. Whoops. I offered her my suit, but she didn’t want to switch. I guess, you can’t win them all. We quickly ordered up some wine to soothe her nervous soul and to ease the bruise on her knee, after the wine kicked in the night went off without a hitch.

Probably reason 2.5 that I’m not a very good boyfriend is that during the reception and especially during the sentimental slide show I couldn’t stop laughing. I didn’t have a funny joke in my head but all I could see was us falling in the crosswalk. I’m sure I was getting the evil eye from the people sitting behind me. Even right now I’m giggling to myself about the fall. Man! I’m such a 10-year old.

After the reception we crossed at a different crosswalk and made it home safe. For the record I don’t think boyfriends should be responsible for telling girlfriends what to wear, we’re clueless. Heck, this one can’t even prevent himself from falling on his girlfriend! Casual, formal it’s all the same to me!


  1. mego said,

    December 13, 2009 @ 4:55 pm

    oh poor girl! at least you admit that you’re still 10 yrs old… you better make it up BIG time to HES..:).

  2. Anthony B. said,

    December 14, 2009 @ 6:33 pm

    Casual? Are you kiddin me?
    You are nothing short of utter Class and prestige wrapped up in a Micah.
    Feeeel that..

    __We are the Knights who say Ni__

  3. anthony said,

    December 23, 2009 @ 5:46 pm

    Yo, i need some new micah lovin. Haha. Ill be right here waiting here for it. Peace and we outta here.

    __We are the Knights who say Ni__

RSS feed for comments on this post · TrackBack URI

Leave a Comment